d/Funny • Follow post Save Hide Report My date brought leftovers from another date She arrived at the bar carrying a restaurant bag. I asked if she had grabbed dinner. She casually said, “Yeah, I had another date before this.” Okay. At least she’s transparent. Then later she offered me some of the leftover pasta. I said no. There are limits to how much efficiency I can respect. 0 0 Share
d/Funny • Follow post Save Hide Report My coworker has been stealing my lunch and i finally caught him For three weeks my food kept disappearing from the office fridge. Not every day, just often enough to make me question whether I had actually packed lunch. Yesterday I put my container in the fridge and stayed nearby. Around noon, one of the senior guys from another department walked in, opened my container, took two pieces of chicken and closed it again. I said, “You like it?” He froze. Then this 45-year-old man looked me directly in the eye and said, “I thought this was communal.” Sir. It had my... 0 0 Share
d/Funny • Follow post Save Hide Report My roommate has been renting out my parking spot I don’t own a car, so my assigned parking spot stays empty. Yesterday someone asked me to move “my other vehicle.” Confused, I checked. Random car in my spot. Turns out my roommate has been charging a guy from another building $80 a month to use it. For almost a year. He offered me 20% after getting caught. 0 0 Share
d/Funny • Follow post Save Hide Report I found out my girlfriend has a nickname for me in her group chat Saw a message pop up from her friends: “Is Spreadsheet coming tonight?” I asked who Spreadsheet was. Silence. Apparently it’s me because I once made an Excel sheet to compare hotel prices for a trip. I thought I was being helpful. I’m now a Microsoft Office character. 0 0 Share
d/Funny • Follow post Save Hide Report My date ordered the same meal as me then blamed me for it I ordered first. She said, “That sounds good, I’ll have the same.” Food arrives. She doesn’t like it. Takes three bites and says, “I wish you had ordered something better.” I reminded her that menus generally allow independent decision-making. That did not improve the evening. 0 0 Share
DailyTalkz
